We are all longing for deep connection in our lives but sex-driven relationships isolates us in certain ways and keep us reliant only on sex to keep us involved. Truthfully, if everyone would be having intimate, connected sexual experiences, the world would be a peaceful, happy place. That may seem non-realistic but think about the peace you feel when you’ve had a deep sexual exchange with someone.
Contrary to the things you have been made to believe through modern Nollywood movies and internet porn, sex is not about an orgasm but a
real merging, where the two become one, as we say in Christianity. Orgasm is the main aim of porn sex. Nollywood depiction of hungry and hurried sex is also made to make you think that an orgasm is the only goal of sex, but in a deep soul-stirring sex, an orgasm is the beginning.
In a love-driven intimate encounter, energy of orgasm is released physically but moves into a meta-physical dimension lending healing
energy to both parties, drawing two people deeper into each other, and closer to higher states of consciousness or infinite intelligence. This is not something to get into hurriedly.
After you have gain an understanding of your person and have decided on what you want sex to mean to you, it is necessary to also ease into sex when you are ready to begin having sex. Do not try to do everything at once. Nollywood is just an abridged version of people lives, that is why they have to hurry even important things like sex. For you, this is your real life. It is not abridged, you are not presenting in on a DVD plate. You are living it!
Spend time on each activity before moving to the next one. Spend a week or two just kissing your mate before advancing to incorporate smooching, then the teasing and proceed like that until you finally begin the real thing until you get to the pick.
When you do all that has been suggested here and have taken time to ease into sex, your sexual debut will not be one of regrets but a memory you will proudly herald as part of your life.